


Mistakes Can Change Everything

by Destiel_Cockles



Series: Wincest Firsts [5]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: (so far until next chapter) Bottom Sam, Anal Sex, Drunk Sex, Feels, First Time, Love Confessions, M/M, Oral Sex, Rimming, Sam gets talkative when he's drunk, Set in Season 1, Sexual Content, Sibling Incest, Size Kink, Top Dean, Unrequited Love, Wincest - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-30
Updated: 2014-06-01
Packaged: 2018-01-27 15:50:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1716140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Destiel_Cockles/pseuds/Destiel_Cockles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam didn't mean to say it, it had been a mistake. But those four words that slipped out of his mouth just changed everything.<br/><em>I want you, Dean. </em><br/>How could he have said that?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Did I really just say that out loud?

**Author's Note:**

> I am on a Wincest smut writing kick...I just wrote this and the next chapter will be good I promise, will get it up asap.

It hadn't even been a week since Dean picked him up from Stanford. Sam would have thought that all of that time away from his brother would have lessened the overwhelming desire to be with him. It hadn't even been ten _seconds_ after he laid eyes on Dean after not seeing him for so long that every emotion and feeling he felt towards Dean came rushing back, and then some. It was _so_ much worse, the nagging and overwhelming desire and need to be with Dean consumed his every thought, he wanted it with every fiber of his being. He craved having his brother more than anything he had ever wanted. It should have been the worst time of his life, having just violently lost the only serious girlfriend he had ever had in the most traumatic, fucked-up full circle universe hates the Winchesters fashion. But as much as he loved Jess, and as horrible as it was to admit it to himself now that she had died, and died because she just happened to be with him, Sam had not been _in_ love with her. Not like he was in love with his older brother. He had never felt that way about anyone besides Dean, and he knew he never would.

So here he was back on the road with Dean, just like old times. Dean drinking a beer, listening to music Sam could not stand, driving down another stretch of highway, all the while slowly driving him insane because he wanted so bad to just tell him how he felt. He would have given anything for Dean to feel the same, and there were times he thought he did. Even if he did, he knew his brother and he knew what his reaction would be. If he didn't fly off the handle and punch him, he would shut down completely, be in a shitty mood and pretend nothing happened. Even if Dean did want that he knew how eternally stubborn Dean was, how he thought it was his duty to make Sam's life not be as shitty as his was. Dean would think that it was wrong, and that probably would not stop him, not because they were brothers but because he had always felt like he screwed everything up and even though he had a cocky attitude and his bravado would make you think he was really full of himself, he actually was nauseatingly hard on himself, hated himself even.

While Dean was driving, singing along with the radio he was totally oblivious to his brother plotting ways to get what he had wanted for so long. Sam had a plan, but he couldn't commit to how exactly to carry it out. He knew how he wanted it to end up though, he even accounted for Dean having a not so great reaction and he knew it was going to involve having to convince him. He was a realist and he knew his life would never be easy, and he really didn't care if it wasn't, so long as Dean went along with this. He was trying to decide whether he should just casually start flirting. No, Dean was the ultimate flirt and next to him he had no game whatsoever, even without comparing himself to Dean he had zero luck in that department, he didn't have the confidence to do or say the things like Dean did. He had to be a little more discreet and gradually turn it up, gauging how Dean was reacting. Sam was just thinking about whether he should try to start risking some not-so-subtle touches to Dean when he glanced over and Dean shoved the beer he had been drinking between his legs and grabbed a map from the visor. Sam's eyes were immediately drawn to that lucky can of beer that was wedged right where he wished he could be at that moment.

Dean tossed the map at Sam. "Hey, make yourself useful and figure out which exit I need to take."

Sam blinked and unfolded the map. "Um...where are we even at? Are we still in Kentucky?"

Dean glanced over at Sam with an aggravated expression. "The fuck have you been doing over there? Haven't been in Kentucky for hours. We passed through Indiana ages ago. Must be nice to fucking sit and day dream while one of us takes things seriously."

Sam looked at the map. They must be in Illinois, he wasn't going to ask Dean where they were so he waited, hoping there would be a sign coming up and he could figure out where the hell they were.

Dean snatched the map from Sam, grumbling under this breath. He was glancing down at the map, while the car started swerving into the wrong lane.

"Watch it Dean, you're on the other side of the road. Shit, how fast are you going? Slow down."

"Jesus Sam, don't tell me how to fucking drive. Such a little bitch."

"You're such a fucking jerk. Just stop being your usual stubborn self and give me the damn map." Sam leaned forward and grabbed the map, pulling on it so hard it tore in half.

Dean let go of his half. "Fine, take it. What's with you anyway? You're being extra broody."

"Shut the fuck up, Dean. I'm not fucking broody."

Dean saw a sign ahead and flipped his signal on, turning onto the exit ramp. "You're lucky I know where I am now." Dean glanced over at Sam while he was idling at a stop light. "The fuck you aren't broody, you're like a god damn....well I don't even know. Fuck it."

Sam sighed. He had to try to get Dean in a better mood, especially if he was going to try to start working him over when they got to the motel. "So...want to stop and get something to eat before we find a place to stay?"

He saw Dean shrug. "I don't care. Just want to get there so I can take a fucking shower and get some sleep. One of us has been driving for ten hours, and one of us busted his ass on the last job so the other wouldn't get killed."

Sam knew there were three things that were guaranteed to always put Dean in a better mood: alcohol, sex, and the rush he got hunting or shooting guns. Alcohol, and hopefully sex (with him) would come later, so if he got Dean thinking about shooting guns, he would get in a better mood. It was like he got off on the adrenaline rush of it all. Whatever got him in the mood, Sam was willing to try just about anything. He also knew Dean liked his ego stroked, but he was not at the point where he wanted to kiss his ass just yet. Besides, Dean would be on to him if he acted too out of the ordinary. "I know, I know....I'm out of practice. Tomorrow we could go um, shoot guns or something. Get back to where I was, better than you at hitting a target."

Dean scoffed. "What the fuck ever dude, I've always been a better shot. _Always_. Probably will be forever. I might have taught you everything you know but I still know more than you." Dean thought for a minute, it seemed strange to him that Sam would want to voluntarily do some shooting, or anything related to hunting at all. He normally had to drag him along and he would complain the entire time. "Since when do you want to do shit like that? Usually you bitch and moan about anything having to do with a job."

 _Crap, he's suspicious_. Sam figured he may as well start complimenting him, just not too much because all he needed was for Dean to get even more cocky. "I need to be more like you if we're going to do this, not that I could ever be as big of a bad ass as you are. I wish things came to me that easy, it's like you don't even have to try."

"Got that right. Didn't think you'd ever say something so true, come to think of it...you never say shit like that to me. Now I know something's wrong with you." Dean took the last sip of his beer and tossed it in the bag before he pulled out a new one. He glanced over at Sam and opened his mouth but thought it was best to leave it alone and turned back to focus on the road. 

He was definitely on to him, he knew Dean had no idea what he was up to, but he definitely knew he was up to something. Sam decided that it would be best to change the subject. "So you're going to just go to sleep when we get there?"

Sam didn't want Dean to go right to sleep, it would ruin his plan, and he doubted he would just sleep right away no matter how tired he was. He knew Dean, and he would most likely go to a bar, get drunk, and try to get some. Sam definitely did not want him to hook up with yet another girl so he had to start putting his plan into motion a little faster. 

Dean shrugged. "I dunno. Should go hit up a bar. Make some money, find a halfway decent girl and get a little ass. You should too Sam, loosen up a little. Get that stick that's wedged so tightly up your ass-"

"Dean," Sam interrupted through gritted teeth. "Stop trying to hook me up with random girls."

"You really should try to...get your mind off of...stuff." Dean bit his lip, maybe he shouldn't have went there. It was probably too soon. Sam didn't seem as upset as he would have expected so Dean figured something else was bothering him.

"I don't want a random hook up."

"Hey, if you want to wait around for the right girl to come along, go right ahead. All I'm sayin' is that until that happens there's nothing wrong with getting a little-"

"Dean, I want _you_ ,” Sam blurted.  _Oh shit. SHIT! What the fuck did I just say? Did I really just say that out loud?_ Sam couldn't believe the mistake he had just made. He wondered how the hell he could have possibly not known he was speaking rather than just thinking it. He was so screwed. 

Sam risked a quick peek at Dean, but surprisingly Dean hadn't caught on yet to what Sam was actually saying. He was grinning and asked, "Want me to what?"

Dean glanced over and noticed Sam's expression, he seemed shocked and a little anxious. Sam could tell that Dean was thinking about what Sam had just said. He could practically see what Dean was thinking as he realized what Sam had actually meant and it hit him full force. The grin slowly faded and all of the color drained from Dean's face as he quickly turned his eyes back on the road. Dean’s hand clenched down on the steering wheel so tight his knuckles where white and the vein in his arm was bulging. His expression was unreadable, but the ensuing silence was deafening.

"Dean..I um, I-I..." Sam stuttered. He had no idea how that just flew out of his mouth. He had been thinking it and then suddenly it happened, he didn't even know what he was saying until he heard himself say it.  So far Dean didn't seem too upset, but he seemed to just be in shock. 

“You don’t know what you’re saying, Sammy.”

"I do so, Dean,” Sam protested. He knew he sounded like a whiny petulant little brat but he didn't even care at that moment. He had fucked up and blurted it out. He had a plan, a plan to slowly convince Dean he was in love with him and ease him into it, knowing Dean's reaction to this was not going to be easy. Not at all. But there was no turning back now, he had to just deal with it and do some damage control before the initial shock wore off and Dean started to get pissed. He knew Dean hated when he acted like a bratty little brother so he took a deep breath and tried again. “Dean, I do know..." Sam paused, Dean was staring straight ahead with his eyes narrowed, obviously deep in thought. "...Dean, are you even listening to me?”

 _“No_.” Dean shot back sharply. He turned to look at Sam, really look at him. Sam saw so many things he wasn't sure how to read into Dean's expression. He saw confusion, anger, pain, relief, desperation, maybe even a little bit of hope. Sam had no idea which of those feelings was the most dominate. He prayed it was hope, maybe even desperation he'd take anything if it wasn't Dean getting angry.

“Sam, seriously...let's just pretend you didn't say that and...” He trailed off. Dean was hanging by a thread. His normal cocky, nothing-phases-me façade of control and hard assery on the brink of shattering into millions of pieces. He was now just trying to save face. Sam had admitted to it, actually fucking said it out loud and totally out of the blue. As bad as he just wanted to turn to Sam and tell him how much he wanted him too, he couldn't. He had messed up Sam's life by dragging him back into this fucked up life, and there was no way he could do this to his brother too. He wasn't even sure this was what his brother truly wanted. Dean had wanted it since he was sixteen or seventeen, he couldn't even remember exactly when or how he realized it. He suspected Sam had felt the same way but convinced himself that he probably led him on. Then there was the fact that he was a guy, a guy that was his _brother_.

"But I love you Dean, I'm _in_ love with you."

"Sammy please, don't say shit you'll regret later and can't take back."

"I mean it, I swear I would never take it back or regret it. You know me, I would never say something like that unless I meant and I really mean it, more than anything I want this..." Sam paused, he wasn't sure how to convince Dean that he really wanted this, and he knew he had to be careful with his words. He wished Dean would just talk to him rather than sitting there quietly sulking. They drove on for a several minutes in silence, Sam desperately trying to figure out what to do, and Dean trying desperately to convince himself that this was wrong and that he should just ignore this like he did everything else he had ever felt for his brother. 

"You can never just...talk things out can you?" Sam asked, noticing Dean had been extra quiet the past few miles, which was so unlike him. Even if he was hit with something like this, Sam would have expected something, a litany of swearing and telling Sam how fucked up this was, or how he couldn't believe he felt that way. But maybe, just maybe since he was saying nothing then he felt the same way.

"Say something. _Anything_. What's with you?" Sam asked carefully.

Dean didn't answer him, he just stared straight ahead. Sam really wasn't sure what to say because blurting this out was so far from where he wanted to be with his plan.

"What's wrong Dean, are you upset?" 

"Nothin' is wrong with me _,_ and no I'm not fucking upset." Dean muttered. "Just leave it alone Sam _._ "

Dean ejected the tape he had been listening to and flipped through the stations, turning the radio up louder. Sam suddenly remembered Dean had always been a shitty liar, at least to Sam about how he felt. He could bullshit his way with anyone else, have any person convinced to do anything at all. He had even been able to always get away with lies to their dad. Dean convinced girls to do everything he wanted all the time, he convinced people he was a cop or anything else during a job. He could lie his way into any place, get anything he wanted and lie his way smoothly out of any situation. But when he lied about something to Sam, Sam immediately knew it.

Sam turned the music back down. "That right there. You do that shit when you don't want to talk about it."

"Maybe I _don't_ want to talk about it. Do you have to turn everything I do or how I do it into a little therapy session? Just...fucking drop it Sam, _please_."

Dean saw a gas station up ahead and whipped the Impala into a parking spot. Dean was about to get out when Sam's hand shot up and gripped his arm. "Dean...wait. Please just...answer one question and I'll drop it. Please?"

Dean had his hand on the door knob, he should have just gotten out. But this was Sam and of course he was going to give in, may as well do it now rather than have him pouting and shooting that damn puppy dog look that got him every time. Got him to cave and give Sam what he wanted, but also fucking turned him on. Dean took a slow, deep breath. "Depends. What's your question?"

Sam looked down at his hands. There was no turning back now, he had to know if Dean wanted it. Even if Dean was resisting now, as long as Sam knew he wanted it, then there was still hope. "Have you ever... _ever_ , even for a millisecond...wanted to..." Sam couldn't even say it. He turned red and picked at a stray thread on his shirt. He risked a peek up at Dean. 

Dean was biting his lip and popping the collar on his jacket. He always did that when he was nervous. Dean looked at Sam for a split second before looking down and nodding. Sam felt a tightness in his chest, Dean actually _did_   feel the same way. That was half the battle, just knowing if he wanted it, but the hardest part was yet to come, convincing him to go along with it was going to be the bitch of it all. He wanted to know why Dean had not said anything, he knew why he himself never did. He never had the balls to do it, but Dean did and he wished one of them would have. "Really? Then why..."

He should get out. Dean knew he should not stay here and admit anything else, not go there. He may want to go there more than anything he had ever wanted but he couldn't. He had fought against how he felt for so damn long, pushed the feelings aside because he knew deep down no matter how bad he wanted it, even if Sam wanted it just as much that it was wrong. 

"Dean I wish you would have-"

"Did you ever think that maybe you don’t really feel that way towards me? That you think you want it but...I mean I had to have influenced you to feel that way or gave you the wrong idea at some point for you to...”

“But Dean. I’ve felt like this for a long time. Years, since before I knew what it all meant I knew there was something there. I always wanted more. I've always wanted to be with you, Dean.”

“Have you?”

There went Dean's last shred of control. Sam did feel that way for as long as Dean suspected. He couldn't help what came out next. He had to get it off his chest. It tore at him since the day Sam left for college. Spiraling him into the worst possisble depression, feeling pain he never thought imaginable, leaving him broken and dead inside. He looked up at Sam, his glassy eyes rimmed with tears. Sam felt like he had been punched in the stomach, his throat closed up.

Dean looked down and barley whispered. “Because if you felt that way...then why did you run off to Stanford? Or...or get in a serious relationship? It's kinda the furthest thing from—" his voice cracked. He wanted to load sarcasm into his response, it normally just rolled off his tongue. It hurt too bad and he couldn't, for the first time ever he felt vulnerable and couldn't take Sam saying he wanted it, because Dean felt that if he did truly want it then he would never have left because Dean would never, ever be able to do the same to Sam. He couldn't take letting this happen only to have it taken away because if he gave in then Sam left again, that would be it. If it didn't kill him he'd want to be dead.

“Don’t do this to me, Sammy. Just.... don’t. Please. That fucking killed me and-”

Dean shifted to look out his window. He couldn't move or he would have been in the men's room already. A minute passed and he finally worked up enough energy to reach for the door handle. Dean kicked the door open as he angrily scrubbed a hand over his wet cheek and stalked into the gas station.

Sitting alone in the car, Sam wondered why he had blurted it out, they were getting along good and he had planned on telling him in a whole different way. He knew Dean was going react like that, be mad or think it was his fault. But when he said what he did about Sam leaving, Sam knew he might have blown his chance forever. He hated that he had been so fucking stupid and left. He couldn't even be slightly happy that Dean had admitted he felt that way too, he might not have come out and said exactly how he felt, and Sam knew he would probably not just openly admit it out loud. Especially not now. Sam knew what would happen when Dean came back in the car. He was going to pretend nothing ever happened and give him the silent treatment. Sam reached over and turned the Impala off, sticking the keys in his pocket. He got out and walked in. Dean was not going to end this his way. He didn't see him in the store so he went to the men's room.

Dean had just finished splashing cold water on his face, then running his hand under the faucet since he had punched the wall so hard two of his fingers were now turning purple. He was at the urinal when Sam walked in, locking the door behind him. 

"Don't even start. Not in here." Dean said, eyes straight forward.

"I'm not..I uh...I gotta take a leak." Sam walked over to the urinal next to Dean.

Dean scoffed. "Mmm hmm. When do you ever use a urinal? You usually go in the stall because you get all weird going in front of people, and why'd you lock the door?"

At least he was talking to him. "Dean...I'm sorry...please just-"

"Sam, _don't_. I came in here to take a piss, not to have a chick flick moment where we talk it out, and everything works out perfect then we hug. Life's not perfect. Not mine anyway."

Dean pulled his zipper up and walked toward the door. Sam quickly zipped his pants and took a few quick strides, beating Dean to the door and standing in front of it.

"Come on Sam. Don't do this shit. Not here. I'm fine with pretending that none of this ever happened and-"

"I'm not Dean, why do you always get to decide what happens. Why do you insist on burying your feelings and when something doesn't go perfect you just pretend it never happened. I want you to listen to me, just fucking listen for five minutes."

Dean took a long deep breath. "I'm listening. But I wish you'd just let us go back to the fucking car instead of standing in a fucking filthy men's room, locked in so when we walk out people will assume we were in here doing god knows what and-"

Sam leaned in and kissed Dean. Dean's eyes widened and he tried to pull back but Sam held his head there. Dean struggled then ducked down and spun around. He ran his hand though his hair and fought the urge to punch the wall again. "What the hell Sam?"

"Well, if people are going to assume we did something, might as well..."

"That's not even funny Sam. I'm getting something to eat. You want anything?" Dean pushed past Sam but Sam grabbed his wrist and pulled hard. Dean struggled for a minute then gave up. He looked at Sam and shook his head. "What the fuck is it you want me to do Sam?"

"I just want you to...give this a chance Dean. Please. Forget the bullshit, the fight. Forgive me for being fucking stupid and leaving. Why do we have to keep living the same bullshit life and suffer? Please just...think about it. We both want it. I fucked up and I will never forgive myself for it but please Dean if you have an ounce of feelings for me give me a fucking chance."

Dean's face softened, he looked down and sighed. "That's just it Sammy. I do have feelings for you. Ok there I said it. But I'm your brother Sam, and it's my job to fucking to take care of you and protect you. I can't do this, I can't be selfish and do what I want because I do care about you. Too much to let this happen." Dean turned and walked out the door. 

Sam sighed. At least he seemed less angry. It was a start. He was going to do everything he could to convince Dean this was the right thing to do. Sam got back in the car and a few minutes later Dean came back with a bag full of food. He handed Sam the bottle of water he had automatically bought because he knew Sam would want one then opened his pop, drinking half of it before feeling his pockets for the keys.

"Fuck. Where the-"

Sam dangled the keys in front of his face and he snatched them up. Dean started the Impala and drove, not saying anything but not scowling like he had been earlier.

"Shouldn't we be trying to figure out-"

"Sam. I'm tired, I've been driving for days and I just want to stop at the first motel we see and get some sleep. Then when I wake up tomorrow we are going to pretend none of this ever happened, and no one said those things they didn't mean."

"I did mean it Dean."

Dean sighed. He spotted a diner so he slowed down and pulled in. He turned the car off and looked at Sam. "Look. I just...I can't do this right now. Give me some time to wrap my head around this and...fuck. I don't know. I really don't." Dean sat back, looking up at the roof of the car. He closed his eyes for a minute then sat back up. "Why don't you go get us some food to-go and I'll go to the liquor store. I'd rather just...pretend today never happened but we both know that won't happen. When we get to the motel...we'll go from there."

"You mean..." Sam didn't want to get his hopes up that Dean was talking about sex.

"What? No. _NO_. I mean give me time to eat, get fucking wasted since you put all this on me and maybe...maybe see where it goes from there. Not saying yes, but I'm not saying no."

Sam smiled, if Dean could go from where he had been a little bit ago to this, Sam would take it. It would be easy to convince him now, especially at the motel and it would be even easier if alcohol was involved. Dean glanced at Sam for a second and opened the door. "Don't forget to get me-"

"I know, I know pie. I'll get you a whole pie. All the pies they have."

Dean rolled his eyes as he got out. "Can't buy me that easy Sammy."

Sam let out a long breath. He was starting to think this might actually work but he didn't want to get his hopes up. Dean could turn it all off in the blink of an eye, especially when his conscious caught up. 

 


	2. Sometimes you can't really start living until you let the past go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean's tired of not getting anything he wants. He needs to let go of the past and just let this thing between him and Sam happen. Of course he is going to wait until Sam makes the first move....and most of this chapter is about SEX

Dean was wandering around the liquor store, wrestling internally with what he should do. He knew it was pointless to stay upset over the whole ordeal. Especially since having Sam back in his life was what he had actually wanted. It had seemed like things had gone back to the way they had been up until that afternoon, and Dean really would rather just try to repress all the the anger and heartache Sam leaving had caused. There really was no point in continuing to feel the way he had now that he had Sam with him. Ignoring his feelings was what he did best so why not just push it aside, he really did not want to feel that way anymore because it had been the darkest and worst part of his life. The only thing he had to worry about now was if he would let this thing between him and his brother turn into something more. Something he had always wanted more than anything, the thing his brother obviously wanted just as bad if not more. 

Dean grabbed a bottle of whiskey and some beer. He wanted to get drunk so he absently picked out a few other bottles while thinking that really there was no reason not to give it a chance. He wasn't even that worried about if he had some how caused Sam to feel that way anymore because Sam seemed to genuinely want it too. His only reservation was he really did not want to move forward and go along with it and have it not work out. He could not imagine what that would do to him. As he paid for the booze he was almost positive he had made a decision, he just hoped it was the right one. 

Sam was still in the diner waiting for the food when Dean got back in the Impala. He opened the bottle of whiskey and took a few long drinks. He noticed there was a motel down the street so he figured they might as well just stay there. Dean had now gotten to the point where he was just going to let things happen. He'd spend over a decade wanting Sam, wondering what it would be like and spending every waking moment with someone that he wanted to be with more than anything but was too afraid of the consequences if it all went wrong. It seemed like this was something Sam really wanted, so odds were in favor of it working out, and it now seemed foolish to agonize over what could happen instead of taking something he actually wanted for once in his life. He surely wasn't going to instigate it, he knew Sam was very shy and hesitate about it, so if he wanted it bad enough he would make a move. Dean was tired of suffering and being pissed about Sam leaving. When Sam kissed him earlier it all changed. It felt so good, so perfect and right. The second that Sam made a move he'd let it go from there, although he was sure that once he started something there would be no way he would be able to stop. Thank god they were getting drunk and his inhibitions were about to be gone.

Dean laid his head back and closed his eyes. He really was tired, but there was no way in hell he'd be able to sleep now until he saw where things went. He now hoped that Sam had not gotten too discouraged because he really  _really_  wanted this to go further. He'd love to have sex with him that night, but he would never push it with Sam. He laughed to himself, he had never held back with any girl in his life so it was going to be all new for him, especially seeing as he never messed around with a guy. Dean drifted off to sleep, holding the bottle of whiskey. Sam opened the door and got in, when he slammed the door Dean jumped up and knocked the bottle on to the ground.

"Drunk already? Damn." Sam laughed.

"Not drunk. I fell asleep because it took you so damn long. Did they have pie?"

Sam pulled out three full pies. Dean's eyes grew almost as big as they were. Sam forgot pie most of the time, and when he did get it he usually only got one, maybe two slices. Dean smirked. Yeah, Sam was totally trying to get some. Dean was fine going along with whatever Sam wanted to do to convince him. He figured he wouldn't tell him what he had decided, he might benefit from this a little. No harm in playing Sam a little, after all he owed him that much. Plus he wanted to be sure Sam wanted it bad enough to make the first move.

"That enough pie for you?"

"I guess it'll do for now." Dean started the Impala and put his arm on the back of the seat to back out. His eyes locked with Sam's, inches from his face when he turned to look behind him. Dean bit his lip and noticed Sam's eyes flickering down to look at them. The only thing Sam could think about was the kiss. It had only lasted a few seconds, but it was so addicting. Looking at Dean's full luscious lips he wanted to just kiss him again right now. He wanted Dean to kiss him back, a real kiss full of passion and lust and even love. He started thinking about all of the things he wanted Dean to do to him. He must have made some sort of noise because Dean cleared his throat and raised an eyebrow at him. Sam hoped he didn't moan or something, he had no idea what was with him today. His stupid big mouth kept blurting things out and getting him caught. When he really thought about it though, as much as it sucked at first, he was glad that everything was out in the open now, especially because Dean seemed to be in a much better mood. Sam smiled to himself, he was sure he was going to be able to get what he knew they both wanted. He hoped that in just a few short hours they would be having sex and all the bad shit that happened and was said would be forgotten. 

Dean shifted the car into drive and headed to the motel. "Figured we'd just stay at that motel down the road. Not the town we were headed too, but I mean...we're here so...ok?"

Sam blinked in surprise, Dean usually never asked where he wanted to stay, normally they just pulled into a motel at random. There was no way he wanted Dean to drive anymore though. He would have been fine with parking the Impala under a bridge and camping out at this point. Any motel was fine because he had concocted a new plan while at the diner. Get Dean drunk, get Dean to kiss him then get Dean to fuck him. No bullshitting around. Hell, he didn't care that much if they didn't talk it over until later. He was beyond feeling horny and it had been much too long to wait anymore. 

Dean pulled up to the motel and ran into the office to get checked in. He thought about just getting a king size bed, but remembered that he was waiting for Sam to make the move. If it were him deciding he would have gotten it, and they would probably be fucking seconds after they walked through the door. They got settled in the room and quickly ate while starting to drink. Sam noticed that Dean seemed to be in an even better mood, he always was after he ate and since Sam was drinking with him it made his mood that much better. Sam figured he'd drink because it usually made Dean happy when he did because he rarely drank with him. Plus, it would make it that much easier to move things along if he was not as anxious about it.

Sam poured out a few shots while Dean was in the bathroom. He sat on the couch and when Dean came out he sat next to him. Sam handed him a glass with about three shots poured in it.

"The fuck you trying to do, get me all fucked up? You slip a roofie in here or something?"

"Shut up. You said you wanted to get smashed, so..."

Dean shrugged and downed the amber liquid while Sam slowly drank his. Dean chuckled, "Such a lightweight, Sammy."

Dean decided it was time to bait the hook. Sam was trying to get him drunk, even drinking with him. He knew if he told Sam he was going to take a shower he would protest. Worst case scenario he'd take one and try to get him in there with him. He sat up and set the glass on the coffee table, just as he was about to get up Sam put his arm on his bicep. He had to resist the urge to squeeze the large firm muscle. "Wait, where are you going?"

"Gonna take a shower."

"Why don't you um...wait?"

"Wait for what? 'Til I get so drunk I can barely stand?"

"No um...."  _Until you can take a shower with me._  Sam grabbed Dean's empty glass and poured some more in. "C'mon, drink up. You said we'd drink then..."

Dean gulped the shot down and snatched the bottle from Sam, taking several long drinks. Sam wrestled it away and took a few drinks. 

"Then what?" Dean slurred.

Sam smiled. Dean was getting drunk, and he seemed to not care as much about letting things happen. Sam shrugged.

"Tell me."

"Tell you what?"

"What you were gonna say."

"Um...we uh, could talk."

Dean made a displeased noise and scrunched up his nose. "Fuck talking. I hate talking. That all you want to do? Talk to me?"

"Well....no."

"Go on, I'm listening." Dean smirked and took a drink. 

Sam took the bottle from Dean and gulped it down. He ignored the burning in his throat as he felt the whiskey slowly starting to relax him. Dean seemed on board with it now, really on board. Sam knew what game he was playing, he was waiting for Sam to make the first move so he wouldn't feel like he forced it. Sam was ok with that, but he had to be drunk to get over his nerves. 

Dean sighed impatiently and crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm waiting..."

Sam was already feeling a good buzz. Dean was being fucking adorable as usual. Damn him. Sam was so horny but he had to focus, it was just hard to think because every time he looked over at Dean, he distracted him with his hotness. Sam smiled, the dimples in his cheeks pushing in at least an inch.

"Shit." Dean muttered under his breath, shifting uncomfortably. Sam was making him so hard. His eyes all huge and that smile that got him every time. He wished Sam would just kiss him already. He never took things this slow, and he never wanted someone so bad. It was so hard to control himself. 

"Thought you didn't like talking."

"You know I don't"

"Then why do you want me to talk about what I want?"

"I don't. Want you to show me."

Sam felt his heart start racing and every ounce of blood flow straight to his now fully erect cock. Sam took a deep breath and set the bottle down. He put a hand on Dean's thigh and froze for a minute.

"That's it? Just wanna touch my leg?" Dean laughed and reached for the bottle but Sam slapped his hand away from it and caught his lips in a kiss. He pulled back and straddled Dean's lap. Dean grinned. "Yeah, that's more like it."

Sam tentatively wrapped his arms around Dean's neck and inched forward. He pressed a soft kiss to Dean's lips then quickly pulled away. 

Dean was about to lean in and  _really_  kiss Sam when he paused. "You sure about this Sammy?"

Sam nodded hard and crushed his lips to Dean's. The instant their lips touched it was like an atomic bomb going off. Every nerve ending felt charged, the heat surging through them was like a fire broke out and each emotion ever felt toward one another was heightened to infinite amounts. Dean's hand shot up and started running his hands softly through Sam's hair, putting a hand on the small of his back and pulling him closer. Dean took over the kiss, gliding his tongue around Sam's mouth, gradually intensifying the kiss until teeth were scraping, tongues were twisted around each other and they were rocking into each other while their hands groped every inch of each other's body. Neither could get enough, the kiss deepened and got hotter and more intense. Sam pulled back, gasping for air so Dean moved and started kissed down Sam's jaw and up his neck. Sam stretched his neck out and moaned softly as Dean worked his tongue up Sam's neck, sucking down lightly. He traced his tongue up behind Sam's ear as Sam twirled his fingers in his hair and down his neck.

Sam ran his hand up Dean's muscular chest and grabbed his shirt, balling it in his fist and yanking it up until Dean pulled back enough to let him rip it over his head. Dean pulled Sam's shirt off, pulling him close. They both moaned at the feeling of their bare skin on each other. Sam buried his face in Dean's neck, kissing and lightly sucking on it, clutching him close and not wanting to let go. He was afraid if he let go, this would all be over too soon and Dean would wake up sober tomorrow and things would go back to where they were, or worse and he could never go back to it now that he had it, and they had barely even started messing around. He was already addicted to it. 

Dean stroked Sam's hair for a minute, not sure if he was having second thoughts. He lightly massaged Sam's shoulder and kissed the top of his head. "You ok Sammy? Maybe we should stop if-"

Sam jerked his head up and looked into Dean's eyes. "NO." He saw Dean look down, probably starting to think Sam was regretting the decision to do this. Sam grabbed his chin and jerked his head so he would look at him. Dean shook his hand off but continued looking into his eyes. "Dean...I want this I just..." Sam sighed.

"Tell me, you're the one who's so big on telling each other how you feel. What's wrong? Not what you thought you wanted?"

" _No_ , Dean I want it. It's actually so much better than I thought. I just, if something happens and this stops..."

Dean pulled Sam into a kiss. "I'm not going anywhere. Promise, this is all I want. Stop trying to be a buzzkill don't think about stupid shit that doesn't matter. I would never do that to you Sammy."

"But...I hate that I-"

Dean pressed his lips firmly to Sam's. " _DON'T_ ," he muttered against his lips continuing to talk as he kissed him "...ever bring it up again..." Dean pulled Sam closer, kissed him harder. "It's over.." Sam nodded, running his hand across Dean's jaw. Dean slid his hand down Sam's back, teasing his finger barely in the waistband of Sam's jeans. "This is all that matters now."  

Dean started sucking down on Sam's neck, grinding his hips into him. Sam moaned as he felt Dean's tongue slide behind his ear, his teeth grazing his ear lobe then traveling back down his neck. Dean was biting down on his shoulder when Sam suddenly thought of something. He was pretty drunk, and when he got drunk sometimes he talked too much."So one more thing...then I promise I'll shut up."

Dean sucked down harder on Sam's neck and sighed. "I don't want you to shut up...but this wasn't the kind of stuff I pictured you saying."

"So you thought about us doing this?"

Dean pulled away and looked at Sam. "You didn't?"

"All the damn time. I just...didn't think you..."

Dean took a deep breath. "I really would rather be doing this..." Dean kissed Sam hard then pulled back. "...instead of talking. But yes, all the time. To the point if I didn't think about you when..." Dean trailed off and started sucking on Sam's nipples.

"When what?"

"Never mind... c'mon Sammy. Not how I pictured our first time, having a conversation about a bunch of random shit."

Sam nodded and looked down. "Sorry."

"Don't be sorry just...we'll talk later ok? I promise. Look, all I was going to say was...if I didn't think about you I never got off."

"Like...jerking off?"

"Ever."

"Really? Even when you um, had sex?"

"Yeah. You never...?"

"Well yeah. Every time. Did you ever..."

"What?"

"You know..."

"No, I don't know..."

Sam sighed and muttered. "Mess around...with a guy?"

"No."

"Never wanted to?"

"No."

"You um..still want to with me though, right?"

"Oh my god Sam what do you think?" Dean saw Sam shrug. Dean muttered, "I would never let  _anyone_  else....you're the only one I'd let...."

Sam felt his dick twitch. "Really?"

" _Yes_  and I hope we can get to doing it sometime this century."

"So you'd let me...."

"Jesus Sammy, what do you think?"

"You just.. I just...never thought you'd..."

Dean laid back and pulled Sam down with him. "You sure you're not trying to stall? You're awfully talkative. You're never this fucking talkative."

"I'm just nervous ok?"

"About what?"

Sam buried his head back in Dean's neck, he knew Dean had to be thinking he was being a major girl right now. The damn alcohol had his emotions all over the place. He had to snap out of it, he was crazy to be talking when he was so damn close to finally getting everything he ever wanted. "I've never done this before." 

"I know, I'm you only brother...."

"Ugh you know what I mean. Never with a guy...never with someone I love and what if...what if it isn't good for you?"

Dean ran his hand over his face. "That's what this is all about? Sam, it's going to be the best. Sex doesn't ever feel bad...but I mean it's going to be better because it's you...and..." Dean really did want to have sex, but being Dean he had to make sure Sam was comfortable with it first. He had no idea how they had gone from making out the way they were to talking. Dean traced a finger over Sam's back and whispered, "It's going to be the best because I love you Sammy."

Sam pushed up on Dean's chest and looked at him, smiling. "You do?"

 _"Yes._  I'd love to have sex with you too..."

"I'm sorry I just...God I don't know. I wanted this for so many years and I'm dying to do it but now I'm just being stupid."

Dean picked up the whiskey and took a drink then handed it to Sam. "Take a few drinks and chill out."

Sam gulped down several drinks and pulled Dean in for a sloppy kiss. He was really drunk now. "OK, no more fucking around, well...I mean messing around...I mean no more  _talking_  because I want to mess around and I want you to fuck me and-"

Dean pressed his lips to Sam, taking the bottle from him. "You are officially cut off. You're fucking lit. Don't want you passing out on me." 

Sam opened his mouth to protest and tried reaching for the bottle. Dean gently pushed his hand away then downed the rest of the whiskey. "There. Now you can't have no more. Only thing you need...is this." Dean put Sam's hand over his aching erection. Sam grinned and ran his palm roughly across Dean's cock. "Shit. So ready for this. Damn I'm drunk. You drunk Sammy? Oh yeah I forgot you're wasted. Ok so how...how you want me to do you?"

"How do you want it?"

"Asked you first. When you thought...'bout me fucking you...what way did you think about?"

"You on top of me. What did you think about?"

"Shit. All kinds of shit. Every time I look at your ass I think about all the ways I want to pound into it."

Sam turned red.

Dean was so drunk he started saying stuff he never imagined actually admitting to Sam. "Damn I love when you blush Sammy. Love everything about you. I've been wanting to bend you over and fuck you into the mattress for years, and watch you ride me. Fuck. Then I thought about riding you every time I'd pound my fingers up my ass and-" Dean bit his lip, wishing he hadn't said the last part. 

"You finger yourself? Damn De, that's hot. Should let me watch sometime."

"You don't?"

"I could never...it always...I-" Sam felt himself blush all the way down to his chest.

"Oh Sammy, you're such a virgin."

Sam playfully punched Dean's arm. "Shuddup Dean. So are you."

Dean laughed, "Let's take care of that then."

Dean wasn't messing around anymore, he was in no mood to hold back. He went right in for a deep kiss, sucking down on Sam's lip and plunging his tongue inside. He rubbed his palm firmly up Sam's erection and unbuttoned his jeans then pushed the zipper down. He shifted Sam so he was positioned right over his erection and leaned forward to suck down on his chest. Dean flicked his tongue across Sam's nipple and tugged lightly on it with his teeth. Sam arched his back, trying to push harder into Dean for more stimulation. Dean put a hand on his hip then slid it down his back and into his boxers. Sam gasped when Dean grabbed his ass. Dean slid his finger down the crack of his ass and teased his finger over his rim.

Dean worked his lips back up Sam's neck to his lips. Sam was surprised how Dean kissing him felt better than any sex he had ever had. He was also a little surprised that he could be as gentle as he was but when he got rough it was just as amazing, it all was so mind blowing. He could go from kissing rough and heated to slow and sensual, and both ways had him so desperate for more. He could let Dean kiss him forever, he knew he could get off on Dean kissing him completely untouched because it was that amazing. Dean had started kissing him softly, working it up making it more and more heated as he ran his hands in places that had Sam about to lose his mind. Every time Dean touched him it felt so amazing, then his hand would move somewhere else and feel even more incredible. Sam had never felt anything like it and he could not get enough.

Sam's head was spinning from the kiss, he knew Dean was a good kisser because he had grown up overhearing girls talk about what an amazing kisser Dean was, how good he was with his hands, and how he was mind blowing in bed. It was all true and then some, Dean seemed to know exactly how to kiss him and where to touch him. Sam almost felt like he was floating then he realized Dean had stood up and was carrying him over to the bed.

Dean tossed Sam on the bed, when he tried to push him back Sam sat up straighter and kissed Dean as he fumbled with his belt. He gave up and tried pushing his zipper down but he was too drunk from the alcohol and the feeling of Dean's lips on him to remember how a zipper actually worked. 

"Ugh, Deeean take those off. Boxers too." Sam laid back and moved up to the top of the bed.

"Not in the mood to talk anymore, huh? Good, only thing I wanna hear now is how much you like it. Wanna hear you scream."

Dean slid his jeans down, kicking them off the rest of the way. Sam pushed himself up and looked down. "Dean," He huffed. "I said-"

Dean shoved his boxers off and went up to kiss Sam. "Want it bad huh?" Dean muttered against his lips.

"More than anything." Sam ran his hands down Dean's back and firmly grabbed his ass, kneading his fingers in the tight muscles. He slid his hand down and grabbed Dean's dick, moving his hand up and down in a quick jerky motion.

Dean moaned at the stimulation he had been desperate to have for so long. _"Fuck_." He pushed his hips harder into Sam's hand as he unzipped Sam's jeans and worked them down his thighs. 

"Damn De."

"Mmm  _shit_...." Dean let Sam jerk him hard a few more times before pulling Sam's jeans off the rest of the way. He ran his hand over the front of Sam's boxers then moved Sam's hand off. No way he was going to come before he got in. He remembered Sam saying something, he was a little hesitant to ask him what he was saying in case he started rambling on like he had earlier but he figured he should in case he wanted Dean to do something different. "Uhh, what?"

"You're...you're...fucking  _huge_."

"Mmm hmm." Dean mumbled as he licked down Sam's stomach. He let Sam babble on drunkenly as he worked his way down to his hips, sucking down on his hipbones.

"I-I mean it De...wow. I like...I-I figured you'd be big too but _holy shit_. Can't wait to suck that big fat cock of yours. If I can fit it all in my mouth. Probably fucking gag me before it's halfway in. I mean I've seen you naked, which drove me fucking insane by the way but not like... _hard_. Well maybe a few times like when I walked in on you jacking off or like that time I saw a girl give you head once. You know what? When I saw that bitch giving you a blow job the only thing I could think though was, shit I could do it  _so_  much better. Make you fucking come so god damn hard. So did you ever scare any girls away with that huge dick? I mean I gotta admit I'm a little concerned if it's gonna all fit in me but I can't wait because-"

 _"Sammy_." Dean snapped. Dean let out a deep breath as he leaned up and kissed Sam then pressed his forehead to Sam's. "How about you lay back and enjoy what I'm about to do to you? I know you're drunk but  _shit_."

"S-sorry. Just...Oh god I want it so bad."

Dean kissed Sam one last time before nudging his thighs further apart and kneeling between them. "Me too. So fucking bad. You're not helping talking about that shit either."

"Ha! What do you think you do to me? Every fucking second of the day you drive me fucking nuts. Haha nuts...yeah my nuts always hurt because I want you so damn bad. I can't help it you got a big fucking huge dick and I want it Dean."

Dean knew Sam was a happy drunk but he didn't think it would get like this. If he wasn't out of his mind horny at that moment Dean would have been laughing because Sam would never in a million years be saying any of this sober. He wished he had a video camera to record it. Even more to record the noises he was about get Sam to make. He knew a good way to get him to choke on his words. Dean licked a stripe up Sam's cock.

"I actually didn't get to really  _see_  it. But I felt it and  _damn_. Fucking thick. I can feel it pressing on my leg right now. All huge and..like ginormous. And ohhhhh.....shit."

Dean smiled as Sam gasped, the feeling of Dean's hot tongue on his cock stopped all thoughts. Dean licked up Sam's balls and drug his tongue up the bulging vein on his shaft, which made Sam moan out his name. When Dean started sucking down on the tip Sam gasped and pushed down lightly on Dean's head to try and get him to take more in. "Oh my god Dean. Fuck."

Dean teased his tongue into his slit, lapping up beads of precome. He wrapped his hand around the base and twisted his wrist up his shaft. "Gonna stop talking about that, just tell me what you want or if it feels good?"

"Yeahh ohh c'mon De...put your lips back on me. Girly fucking lips. So fucking plump, bet they're gonna feel so damn good wrapped around my cock."

Dean couldn't even be mad that Sam wouldn't shut up, he would probably not be this drunk again for a long time. He was just making him so damn horny he was about to lose his mind. 

Sam felt Dean pushing his rock hard cock against his thigh. "De...damn I-I want it bad. So damn bad. Please... stop blowing me and just fuck me already."

"Wow. Should've got you this drunk ages ago."

Dean picked up Sam's thighs and put them over his shoulders as he held him open. He worked up some spit and slid it over his rim. "Ohhhhh fuck...fuck Dean."

Dean plunged his tongue deep inside his brother's ass then slid the tip of his finger in. He felt Sam tense up a little so he pulled back and just teased his finger over his rim while he jerked his wrist up his shaft. When Sam started moving his hips he slid his finger in further. He held him open and dug his tongue over the smooth silky skin. Sam was moaning and pushing down so Dean eased a second finger in and scissored his fingers around as he thrust his tongue in and teased it back over his rim. By the time he worked a third finger in, he had to pull back and just let Sam pound down on them.

"Like that?" Dean asked as he rammed his fingers into Sam. He pushed his pinky in under his other fingers and Sam groaned and bucked down hard.

"Shit Dean...fuck, I love it...oh god I can't wait for you to be in me."

"Fuck Sammy. So hot to see you fucking yourself on my fingers.  _Shit_."

"De...oh god." Dean had his hand in so deep, he hit his prostate and Sam screamed out. Dean ran his hand up his own cock a few times, listening to his brother scream and beg for it had him throbbing, just aching to be in him.

"Pleeease Dean, I need you in me." 

Dean eased his fingers out and put Sam back down so he was lying flat. He stretched over him and slid his cock over Sam's a few times, kissing him until he calmed down enough, otherwise he would probably bust a nut the second he entered him.

Dean rubbed the head of his cock over Sam's rim, feeling him tense up. Dean kissed Sam gently. "Relax," he whispered as he slowly worked past the think muscle. He felt Sam tense back up, he eased out and continued to kiss Sam softly. He planted kisses up his face and over Sam's forehead, then pressed his forehead against Sam's. He looked him in the eyes as he slowly teased the tip of his dick in and out of Sam. "Just focus on me, do what you have to do to relax, dig your nails in me, bite me..."

Dean circled his hips and gently eased in, it took every ounce of restraint he never knew he had not to just ram in full force. If it was anyone else he would never be able to hold back, but Sam always came first and he wanted everything to be perfect. Dean's hand was shaking as he guided himself in, he wanted it so bad. He finally worked the head of his cock in, Sam was gripping his shoulders tight, digging his nails into him each time he went a little further. "You ok?"

Sam was biting his lip and holding his breath. He didn't care how much it hurt anymore, he wanted this so bad. He closed his eyes and nodded. "Just...thrust in and get it over with so it starts feeling good."

"Hell no. I will not just ram into you. Look at me...." Sam opened his eyes and looked at Dean. "You're not just some piece of ass...just relax. In a few seconds it will be feeling so fucking good, it'll all be worth it once I hit that sweet spot."

Sam took a deep breath, he could hardly believe his hard ass brother was being so gentle and loving, but it really should not surprise him because Dean had always been that way with him. Sam had just figured that since he had heard Dean having loud rough sex most of his life that it would be the same when they did it. He loved the fact that he was the only one that ever got to see the softer side of Dean, and he knew Dean really did love him to be taking his time and trying to make it perfect for Sam, especially because he could tell he wanted it so bad but he was somehow holding back because Dean always put his needs above his own, like he was the only thing in the world that mattered to him.

Dean started kissing Sam harder, he knew if he could distract him enough that Sam would relax. Dean spread Sam's legs open wider as he traced his tongue over Sam's teeth and intertwined his tongue with Sam's. He rocked his hips gently and finally he felt Sam relax. Dean trailed kisses down Sam's jaw then sucked down on his neck, alternating between running his tongue around and sucking down then he moved a little further and started biting down lightly on his shoulder. It must have started to feel good because Sam opened his legs up even further, putting one around Dean's waist. Sam put his foot on Dean's ass and pressed down, trying to get him to push in more. Dean pushed in a little further and winced.

"Ohhh fuck Sammy. Fuck you're so fucking tight.  _Shit_."

Sam finally started moving his hips a little, the pain and burning was gone and the pressure starting to feel really good. He felt so full with his brother's huge cock in him but he liked how it felt, loved it. "Ohhh shit De...it's starting to feel so good. Didn't think you'd ever get it all in though."

"Sammy.... I'm not even half way in."

"Wha....really? Fuck. Ohhh god then fucking slide the rest in because it feels good as fuck."

Dean knelt up and held on to Sam's hips as he slowly slid in all the way. "Mmmm shit Dean just like that."

Dean pulled slowly back out then slid back inch by inch until he was about halfway in then thrust hard and fast. Sam groaned, relishing the feeling of Dean's dick inside of him. He knew sex with Dean was going to be great, but it was indescribable how good it felt, better than anything he had ever experienced. The fact that it was Dean made it so much better. His head was swimming, and not because of the alcohol, he could still barely believe this was happening. Dean was feeling the same way, sex had gotten to the point it wasn't even that satisfying anymore, he always imagined sex with Sam being so superior to anyone else he could never be happy with someone, and this was better, it was the best.

"Fuck Sammy  _so_  fucking tight. Good as fuck. Fucking Awesome." Dean groaned as he rocked his hips harder into Sam, finally feeling him open up enough to really start thrusting in.

Dean pushed Sam's thighs wider apart and bucked his hips faster. Sam felt a surge of white hot pleasure hit him, suddenly his vision was blurry and he started yelling out, "Dean..oh god oh shit...right there..harder..."

Dean dug his fingers into Sam's hips as he pulled him into each hard thrust. He was grunting, the feeling of his brothers ass clenching down on him overwhelming. He was so glad he was so drunk because he would have come already if he wasn't. Sam arched his back and grabbed onto Dean's arm, digging his fingers into his bicep. "Feel good Sammy?"

"Ohhh fuck...yes...amazing..."

Dean wrapped his fist around Sam's cock, it was sweating out precome. He slicked the fluid around then started pumping his fist to match the rhythm of his thrusts. Sam moaned out Dean's name and moved his hands to hold onto Dean's shoulders instead, trying to pull him down closer. They went in to kiss each other at the same time, crashing their lips together as their tongues collided wildly Dean rammed into Sam as hard as he could and Sam rutted against him. They were moaning into each other's mouths, hands running down each other's bodies. Sam reached up and tugged on Dean's nipple, when he got a moan out of him he pulled harder, twisting it.

Dean pulled back from the kiss, out of breath. "Shit Sammy...ohhh so unbelievable..."

Dean's mouth fell open, he was making such incredibly hot sex faces it made Sam feel like he was about to come watching him, he looked so gorgeous Sam felt his stomach clench. Dean could feel Sam tightening even more around him. " _FUCK_ ," a string of curse words flew out of his mouth, Sam was clamped down on him like a vice and the feeling was unreal. Dean couldn't even pull out so he circled his hips and started thrusting his wrist up Sam's cock. Sam was practically delirious, his back arched so high off the bed he looked possessed. 

Dean pressed open mouthed kisses up Sam's collar bone, bending down to suck on his nipples while he twisted his wrist down his shaft and rubbed his thumb over the sensitive skin under his balls. Sam gasped as Dean worked his fist harder up his shaft as Sam came, his cock spewing white ribbons over his chest. Dean bit down on Sam's nipple as he started shaking, then licked up the come off of Sam's chest.

Dean felt his dick twitch hard, watching Sam climaxing and moaning his name as he came was the single hottest thing he had ever seen. "Fuck Sammy...God you're beautiful."

As soon as Sam stopped shuddering Dean slowly slid out and Sam felt Dean's muscular arms wrap around him and gently flip him onto his stomach.

"Wha-?"

Dean quickly trailed kisses up Sam's spine and sucked down on the back of his neck. "Get ready to come again...so hard you'll be screaming this time."

Sam's dick had just barely begun to soften, but Dean was whispering hot filthy promises in his ear and it had him fully erect in seconds. Dean picked up his hips and spread him open, thrusting in with one swift motion.

"Ohhh fuck. Been wanting to do this for so long.  _Son of bitch_ , so fucking...." Dean's voice cut out, his mouth fell open as he pummeled into Sam's ass as hard as he could.

Sam was babbling happily into a pillow, a puddle of drool falling out of his open mouth. "Mmmm fucking incredible De. Oh my god you're in so deep. Think your dick's almost at my throat."

Dean held Sam opened and watched his cock stretch Sam out. " _Ohhh fuck,_  Sammy....that's so hot."

"Mphf?" Sam couldn't even form words anymore, the only thing he could focus on was how amazing his brother's cock felt in him.

"Uhhh shit...watching you stretch out around me. So fucking hot Sammy."

Sam reached his hand back, trying to touch Dean but gave up, his arm fell limply to his side feeling like jelly. His entire body felt like a pile of goo, he had lost the sensation of having bones at all before he had come. Now that Dean was pounding into him full force he felt so blissed out, every thrust felt like pure ecstasy. He heard Dean start grunting, swearing and moaning really loud, he could feel Dean's dick growing impossibly harder inside of him as he felt himself clenched down on him. Sam wasn't sure how but he felt like he was about to come again. He had never felt so incredible in his life.

Dean let go of Sam's ass and gripped his hips as he started coming he pushed into Sam as hard as he could, pulling him along the bed. The friction of Dean pulling and pushing into him caused Sam's dick to rub hard into the mattress and just as he felt Dean's hot come filling him up, he came again screaming out Dean's name.  Dean was shuddering, Sam screaming gave him the last bit of energy he had needed to thrust into Sam a few more times. Dean started to pull out but Sam pushed back into him hard. "No, just...lay with me like this."

Dean maneuvered them around so he was sort of spooning Sam, resting his head on his shoulder, still panting from the most intense orgasm he had ever had. Dean put his arms around Sam and ran them up his chest, pulling him as tight as he could.

"Dean...I never want this to end."

Dean kissed Sam's neck softly, nuzzling his nose behind his ear, getting a shiver out of Sam. "It won't. I promise."

"I wish we would have done this a lot sooner. We have to make up for all that time we lost. Missed out on way too much, this is the best thing that's ever happened to me. Best damn night of my life."

"Definitely the best. Tomorrow will be even better."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, we'll have the whole day to just do this."

"You'd give up a whole day to just have sex with me?"

"Shit I'd give up everything and do nothing but this the rest of my life. This is the only thing I ever want or need."

"You're just drunk or saying that because you just-"

Dean turned Sam around and kissed him. "No. I know exactly what I'm saying."

"You mean...?"

Dean pulled Sam into a deep kiss, bringing him up to lay over him. He started softly caressing his back then gradually worked up to massaging his back and shoulders. He kissed him slow and sensual until Sam pulled away light headed. Sam laid his head on Dean's chest, his heartbeat slowly making him fall asleep. Sam was starting to get too heavy, he was a dead weight from the alcohol, being worn out and totally fucked out.  Dean shifted Sam so he was laying next to him and wrapped his arm around him. Sam automatically curled up around Dean, then sleepily opened his eyes and looked at him.

"You wanted me to do you, I really want to. We can try to-"

Dean kissed the top of Sam's head. "Tomorrow. You can barely keep your eyes open. I don't want you pounding me in the ass half-assed."

Sam laughed, and leaned up to kiss Dean's cheek. Sam wrapped his arm around Dean's waist and fell asleep stretched over him. Not only was he drunk from all the alcohol but also from the feeling of how amazing it was that Dean loved him as much as he loved Dean and the sex, the best sex of his life, had put him over the edge.

Dean lay awake, lightly running his hand over Sam's back and thinking. As much as he wanted to hate himself for not giving in to this sooner, he had to start letting go of the past. He had spent his entire life watching his dad wreck his life over things he could never let go. Nothing was worth feeling so depressed over, even Sam going off to college. Dean was going to really try and forget about all of the bad things that constantly ate away at him. This was the first time in his entire life he had been truly happy. Every time he thought back to a time when he was close to being happy, it involved Sam. He never wanted to lose this, and he knew the life they were living was not going to end well and that it would be a constant struggle loaded with heartache. He thought that maybe he could just give up this life, the life he never wanted his brother to have to finally give him one that he deserved. He wouldn't even care if Sam went back to college as long as they went together. Dean drifted off to sleep, set on making every day of Sam's life better than the last, no matter what it took. He smiled, glad his brother had blurted out what he had because it had changed their lives forever. 


End file.
